Talk:Space 220 Restaurant
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Space 220 Restaurant (final version) received a peer review by Wikipedia editors, which on 20 November 2022 was archived. It may contain ideas you can use to improve this article. |
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Untitled
[edit]How does this sound like an advertisement? I even looked at other articles like splash mountain to make sure i could say some stuff like guest Kaleeb18 (talk) 22:01, 6 October 2021 (UTC)Kaleeb18
- @Kaleeb18: As was mentioned in The Teahouse, the menu offerings are probably the biggest issue. I know you worked really hard on that, but my recommendation would be to change the section header to "Food", and keep only the first paragraph, or expand on that paragraph but without prices and unnecessary puff. Does that help? Pyrrho the Skeptic (talk) 18:03, 8 October 2021 (UTC)
References
[edit]All of the references are Disney or blogs. David notMD (talk) 14:25, 9 October 2021 (UTC)
- Here is coverage in a moderately reliable source, although the coverage was almost certainly generated by Disney's PR people. Cullen328 Let's discuss it 17:59, 9 October 2021 (UTC)
- Here is a better, less promotional source. Cullen328 Let's discuss it 18:06, 9 October 2021 (UTC)
The problem is I think most of the stuff about Disney is going to be blogs or just disney websites unless you scroll through a bunch of websites and find a good website like you did. Still trying to learn so I don’t make these type of mistakes again Kaleeb18 (talk) 00:32, 10 October 2021 (UTC)Kaleeb18
Another source
[edit]This source may be useful. Cullen328 Let's discuss it 04:40, 3 November 2021 (UTC)
GA Review
[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Space 220 Restaurant/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Sammi Brie (talk · contribs) 06:47, 19 August 2022 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Overall: |
The changes are mostly copy. The Reception section has some issues that really, really need fixing—and you're just lucky enough to get someone who can catch one of them as reviewer. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 07:52, 19 August 2022 (UTC)
- 7-day hold to Kaleeb18. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 07:53, 19 August 2022 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review! ― Kaleeb18TalkCaleb 12:55, 19 August 2022 (UTC)
Copy changes
[edit]History
[edit]- "September 20, 2021" needs a MOS:DATECOMMA.
- Is there another source to replace the generally unreliable PopSugar?
Theme
[edit]- Rich Pope of Orlando Sentinel Can we get a "the" before the name of the newspaper?
Done
Food
[edit]- Are there too many names of food items?
- How do the Space Station Supplements figure into the menu? Their nomenclature is...confusing.
Reception
[edit]- A couple of things rub me wrong in this: Josh Elliot of Narcity stated that you will, "Eat better than an astronaut and get a great view of space without ever leaving Earth!" There shouldn't be a comma there, and the use of "you" in the article sounds off. This almost sounds...too promotional. Is there a way to reword?
- "not and E ticket" typo fix
- Your local writer of TV stations articles would highly suggest that any reference to NBC2.com be scuppered for two reasons:
- Declaring, "The effect is engaging, providing just a 'taste' of what the astronauts on the International Space Station experience every day, just with better food." I think this quote is too long. "Declaring" is not a separate sentence, so this needs to be merged with the one before it; I'd tweak it to focus on the "effect is engaging" part.
- I changed the sentence
- Is Finance Buzz a reliable source?
Other items
[edit]- References are archived.
- Earwig mostly catches proper nouns as well as the quotes used in the reception section.
- Images: There is an appropriately tagged fair use logo and freely licensed image of the interior. Both need alt text.
Done
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